


Crucify

by micky (we_have_cake), we_have_cake



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Ambiguous/Open Ending, Angels, Im Changkyun is a coward, M/M, Mentions of religious propaganda, Sad boi hours, Shownu didn’t sign up for this, Unhealthy Habits
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-06
Updated: 2019-06-06
Packaged: 2020-04-11 20:40:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 958
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19117294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/we_have_cake/pseuds/micky, https://archiveofourown.org/users/we_have_cake/pseuds/we_have_cake
Summary: If there’s one thing I know, about angels in alleyways, its that they’re cowards where it counts, and just because their wings are broken, doesn’t mean they can’t fly away.





	Crucify

> _There's an angel that lurks outside the liquor shop._  
>  _On days when office facades were too much to handle and you needed something extra to soothe your aching head._  
>  _He smiles like the devil with an upturned smirk on a fifteen minute cigarette break._  
>  _Taking long drags and longer looks, drawing you in to his intoxicating embrace._  
>  _Tapping burnt ash away with one long finger, nails painted shiny black like oil slicks on the pavement._  
>  _An angel, yes._  
>  _But one cast out of heaven._  
>    
>  _I'm not there often, but when I am so is he like he never gets the day off._  
>  _Sometimes he works the register._  
>  _He sells me my whiskey, I sell him my soul._  
>  _Over a handful of tootsie rolls, an orange flavored lollipop and a pack of cigarettes I sell him my life stories even though I know he doesn't care._  
>  _Why would he._  
>  _He's only there for one thing._  
>  _A kiss._  
>  _A bite._  
>  _A fuck._  
>  _A cigarette lit between my lips, invading my lungs with his vice._  
>    
>  _An angel, yes._  
>  _But one fallen to hell._  
>  _One with broken wings._  
>  _Dragged from it's place of glory._  
>  _Kicking and screaming._  
>  _With jagged breaths and fire on his lips, cursing his creator who betrayed him so cruelly._  
>  _For was it Lucifer's own fault that he was more beautiful and tempting than God?_  
>  _Or was it God himself who made him that way._  
>    
>  _There's an angel who lurks outside the liquor shop._  
>  _He whispers my name with fervent praise and feeds me sticky sweet lies with his strawberry stained lips._  
>  _He dances like that's what his body was made to do and he makes me dance with him._  
>  _Beneath the flashing neon lights of a seedy dance club._  
>  _Pulling me closer and saying._  
>  _This is where I belong._  
>  _Here with him in this sticky, deafening, scorching place._  
>  _In between heaven and hell._  
>  _His body pressed tightly against me._  
>  _The bodies of countless others packed around us._  
>  _Their glittery, sweat stained skin and tequila soaked breath intermingling to create an inescapable mosh pit of writhing flesh._  
>  _I couldn't get out if I wanted to._  
>  _But I didn't want to._  
>  _I would rather be crucified than be without him._  
>    
>  _There's an angel who lurks outside the liquor store though I never see him there anymore._  
>  _It's more common to see him tangled in my bedsheets, mascara and lip tint smeared over his face, bare chest rising and falling with his slow, even breaths._  
>  _Or outside on my balcony taking puffs from a dying cigarette, wearing nothing but one of my old t shirts, wrapped in the morning winds._  
>  _Across from me at my breakfast table, drinking his coffee scalding and black before pressing his mouth to mine and leaving for the day._  
>  _Off to do whatever it is he does._  
>  _I've never been to his apartment._  
>  _Or met his family._  
>  _Or heard any stories about his life._  
>  _I know nothing about him._  
>  _But he knows everything about me._  
>  _It's terrifying._  
>  _Intoxicating._  
>  _I'm falling and relying on him to catch me but I have to way of knowing if he'll be there to stop me from spilling my brains on the pavement when I land._  
>  _And I'm scared._  
>  _But my head tells me that I should be more scared than I am._  
>    
>  _I look myself in the mirror and I remind my self that Yoo Kihyun is no fool._  
>  _But his arms wrap around me, pulling me back to bed and maybe I am._  
>  _Because his tongue tastes like orange lollipops and the kind of lies that slide down your throat like a sweet tonic._  
>  _Coating your insides until your head is fuzzy and full._  
>    
>  _There's an angel that I've known for so long and I don't even know his last name._  
>  _But I cook him breakfast, haul his thin body from between my sheets and I tell him._  
>  _I love you._  
>    
>  _There's an angel with broken wings who was dragged to hell and left on my doorstep._  
>  _Who's lost everything and has nothing left to lose._  
> 
> 
> _But he gets scared of three little words and he runs away._  
>  _He grabs his things and he slams my door leaving a cup of coffee rattling on my table._  
>  _Hot._  
>  _Scalding hot._  
>  _But getting cold._  
>    
>  _He doesn't answer my calls._  
>  _Deletes my voicemails without listening to them._  
>  _Leaves his key to my apartment in the mailbox._  
>  _Never comes back for his makeup box still sitting in my bathroom._  
>  _Or the socks and sleeveless black band tees that appeared in my dresser drawer one day._  
>    
>  _I search the place we met but all I find is an empty alley and a concerned man behind the counter who says he's taken a sick day or two._  
>  _To this day I still thank god for Shownu as his nametag read._  
>  _Who simply stood there sympathetically, keeping his composure even as I fell apart in front of him._  
>    
>  _But Changkyun is gone._  
>    
>  _Like cigarette smoke._  
>    
>  _There's an angel I know_  
>  _Who lurks outside the liquor shop_  
>  _Who's terrified of the words "I love you" and not much else._  
>  _Who catches your eye with a stone cold glare and quickly turns away._  
>  _He'll chase you down, tie you up, leave bruises on your chest, neck and arms._  
>  _And before too long he will own every aspect of your being._  
>    
>  _He likes to pretend he's in control._  
>    
>    
>  _Puts up a convincing facade._  
>  _But if there's one thing I could tell you, about angels in alleyways._  
>  _They're cowards where it counts._  
>  _And just because their wings are broken, doesn't mean they can't fly away._  
>    
>  _And once they're gone they leave you broken._  
>  _Like they've torn your limbs directly from the sockets and nailed you in place._  
>  _Leaving you crucified_.


End file.
